A little over a year ago, I was moving out of the Red Door Inn, the home I had made for myself for the last 4 years. As I was leaving my keys with the new roommate, I felt this pang of sadness, much like you feel at the end a book that you were really enjoying. You're glad to have read it and it had to come to end eventually, but you're going to miss the story. And what stories the walls of that house could tell...
But it was onward up and upward (or just around the corner) for a few months before the big move to France. That summer was a difficult one. There were so many unanswered questions about when we would be leaving and what I was going to do when I got there. Jason wasn't exactly helping the situation with his indecision, though some of it was out of his control, and we fought. He didn't want me to go, and I didn't necessarily want to be in France all on my own but I couldn't stay in Baltimore with nothing to do for an unknown amount of time. I had to go.
A year ago, I was packing all of my worldly possessions into boxes and bags, some to be put aside for later, some to be given away and a special select few got to make the trip across the ocean with me. Those last few days at my parents' house were bizarre, this strange sort of limbo where we were all waiting for what was sure to be something big but we didn't really know what it would be. Looking back on it, I'm not really sure I was excited at that point. I had spent all of my emotions in the weeks leading up to that day and I mostly felt numb. Just get there in one piece.
364 days ago, I had never been to Bordeaux. I had forgotten most of the French I learned once upon a time and it had been years since I had stepped foot inside of a classroom where I wasn't the one giving instruction. I lived in a dorm room in Mérignac and I didn't know a soul in the entire country of France. The whole country! Maybe that's why I wasn't excited. Because I knew what lay ahead would be immensely stressful, lonely and just plain hard.
Fast forward to today. So much has changed since those first moments in France. I am fluent in the French language. I live in a cool apartment right in the heart of Bordeaux with the man I love. I know great places to get good wines for good prices. I have a favorite type of cheese that isn't Swiss or cheddar. I could tell you the best way to get across town from wherever you are (but only if you're taking public transit). I have a job that I enjoy and friends to hang out with on the weekends. I am fairly knowledgeable about French cuisine.
I don't quite know how to explain the intangible changes within me, though. So much about my identity has been shifted this year. I am not French but I don't know if I'm really American anymore, either. I am reading a book whose title translates to "How I Became French" and I can identify with each one of the stories. I no longer fit into nice boxes. In order to integrate into French society, do I have to give up a bit of my American-ness? Am I less like those who share a common birthplace because of my time masquerading as another nationality? Can I ever truly assimilate? Do I have the right to be here and pretend I belong?
What I have found in this last year is that I don't know the answer to any of those questions any better than when I came. The longer I'm here, the more complicated it gets. Bordeaux is my home, the home Jason and I have made together. The US is where I was born and my family and friends are there but it doesn't feel like the same place it once was to me. It has become the place I visit once a year for the holidays. Of course I look forward to going there but I feel like a stranger now. I have to be conscious of how much I talk about France for fear of being that obnoxious ex-pat who can't shut up about their fabulous new life abroad.
But what else do I have to talk about? It's my life. I'm not on vacation, I'm at home. That's the hardest part: A year later, I am still trying to explain that I am not just a tourist, both to the French and to my family and friends back in the US. A year later, I am in another limbo where again, I am waiting. I am waiting to figure out who I am, who I have become. But, unlike a year ago, I am not numb. I am alive.
Happy anniversary, Bordeaux.
Showing posts with label immigrating to france. Show all posts
Showing posts with label immigrating to france. Show all posts
Friday, November 8, 2013
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Finding Home Sweet Home
So you want to rent an apartment in France, do you? GIVE UP. IT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
Okay, that's not true, but it's certainly no easy feat and it seems that there isn't a lot of information out there on how the whole rental process works in France. What is out there is a lot of conflicting ideas and incomplete answers. I will attempt to shed some light on the situation and hopefully you'll have an easier time of it than I have had. You should keep in mind, however, that the property owners and rental agencies vary GREATLY and you may have a completely different experience. That has been a large part of my frustration but read on and all will be explained...
Pro Tip 1: Buy yourself some time to get to know your new city by having a temporary place to live lined up before you arrive. It could be with a friend, a French family (exchange student-style) in a student residence, or at an appart-hotel. All these places will afford you some basic comforts without the cost of a full blown hotel while you figure your life out. My "studio" is really just a dorm room in the suburbs but at least I had a place to sleep and put my stuff the day I got here.
Pro Tip 2: Even with temporary housing, you have to give between one and three months' notice before you can leave. If you hate your place, let your landlords know immediately so that you can move sooner rather than later. Early lease termination is sometimes possible but not always easy so just be aware.
Throughout January and February, long stretches of my days were dedicated to trolling the internet for available apartments. I started out by just Googling "location appartement bordeaux" and finally stumbled across some useful websites where I could enter my search criteria and they populated a list of places that matched. Try these:
By early March, I found a pretty ideal place through Century 21. It was close to tram and bus lines, right up the street from Auchan, just a few minutes from Centre Ville and the quai. I was eager to get the paperwork signed because I was hoping to have the place set up by the time Jason arrived.
NOPE.
There's no credit check in France so you have to prove you have the money to pay your rent. Here is what a typical housing application file will include in France:
Once you have gathered a small forest's worth of papers, you may also be asked to find a garant (sometimes also called a caution). It's explained very well here (in French) but the long story short is that they are a co-signer so that in the event that you don't pay your rent, the agency will come after your garant for the money. This was completely insane to me, but apparently it is normal in France. The law here is very much in favor of the renter. Landlords cannot evict you in the winter and it can take up to two years to kick you out, regardless of the season, even if you don't pay your rent during that whole period. When I learned this, it made sense why some of these apartments were available for so long. Better to take a month to find the right person than to rent to the first bum off the street who might not pay anything at all after the deposit and first month.
Sometimes all a garant has to do is sign the lease along with you, as was the case with Ashley and Guillaume. His mom rolled up and with a flick of a pen, they had a new place to live. Not so in our case, even though we were also going through Century 21. (WTF??) The agent needed the garant to provide all of the documents that we had provided. I was floored. I have been here for four months and the only people I know are my Chinese classmates and my teachers. There's no way I could ask any of them for all that stuff. Jason arrived the day after I got this news and we asked around at his job to see if anyone was willing or able to do it. Some people said it was normal for agencies to require it and they had their parents do it for them, others said it was completely outrageous. Either way, no one was volunteering. Even though we had proved we had the money for it (and then some), we still needed someone to sign with us.
Back to the drawing board.
Pro Tip 3: When you find a place you like, ask up front if they will require a garant. You may need to explain your situation and provide some documents about it, but it's better than getting your hopes up, only to be told you will be systematically denied for lack of a garant. If you absolutely need one and don't know anyone in France, you may be able to get one through a company. Check out Loca-pass and this website, which is a registry of companies that may offer you garant services if you don't know any French people. Be aware, though: We didn't qualify for these because we're too old and because Jason has a real job. Oh well.
What ultimately led me to finding our new apartment was the French version of Craigslist: Le Bon Coin. You can search for pretty much anything on there, including apartments. Armed with the knowledge from my failed initial attempts and a bit of urgency since sharing a twin bed is the worst thing ever, I was on the hunt again. I now knew the right questions to ask (When is the apartment available? Do you require a garant? How much is due up front?) and didn't waste time going on visits to places that weren't going to work out anyway.
Pro Tip 4: If you're anything like me, you will be tempted by big-name agencies because you will think them to be more credible. This may not be the case. Some agencies are bums and will not take care of problems in your apartment if you have them. Your colleagues may offer a friend of a friend who knows a guy who has a place to rent. Against your American judgement, this might be your best bet. They probably won't charge you an agency fee and they might treat you better because you're a friend (of a friend of a friend). YOU JUST NEVER KNOW. Ask around as much as possible to get a feel for the rental climate in your area.
Once I figured it out, it really wasn't too difficult. I saw the ad two weeks ago on a Monday and replied to it, I set up a visit for later that week, I brought my application file with me and gave it to her that day. Two days later, she called me and told me our application had been accepted. I had to go by the agency and pay the deposit last week. Today, we had our état des lieux meeting, in which you go through everything in the house and write down it's condition, and then she handed us the keys. The furniture is being dropped off on Friday and we'll be sleeping in a real bed by this weekend! We thought of furnishing the place via Le Bon Coin as well but since we don't have a car and the new apartment is on the top floor of the building, we just decided to buy everything from Ikea and have it delivered. Problem solved.
Why someone couldn't have just told me all that when I got here, I don't know, but I figured it out and I am glad it's over. I hope that this post can help other poor souls looking for a place to live in France. This website is also incredibly useful. That link is the housing page but they have all kinds of other information for anglophones, too. It is a long and arduous process but it's a pretty good feeling to be living in a place that I actually enjoy coming home to. Worth it.
Can't wait to throw a housewarming party!!
Okay, that's not true, but it's certainly no easy feat and it seems that there isn't a lot of information out there on how the whole rental process works in France. What is out there is a lot of conflicting ideas and incomplete answers. I will attempt to shed some light on the situation and hopefully you'll have an easier time of it than I have had. You should keep in mind, however, that the property owners and rental agencies vary GREATLY and you may have a completely different experience. That has been a large part of my frustration but read on and all will be explained...
Pro Tip 1: Buy yourself some time to get to know your new city by having a temporary place to live lined up before you arrive. It could be with a friend, a French family (exchange student-style) in a student residence, or at an appart-hotel. All these places will afford you some basic comforts without the cost of a full blown hotel while you figure your life out. My "studio" is really just a dorm room in the suburbs but at least I had a place to sleep and put my stuff the day I got here.
Pro Tip 2: Even with temporary housing, you have to give between one and three months' notice before you can leave. If you hate your place, let your landlords know immediately so that you can move sooner rather than later. Early lease termination is sometimes possible but not always easy so just be aware.
Throughout January and February, long stretches of my days were dedicated to trolling the internet for available apartments. I started out by just Googling "location appartement bordeaux" and finally stumbled across some useful websites where I could enter my search criteria and they populated a list of places that matched. Try these:
- Se Loger: There's a French version (which may be more complete) and an English version (which is sometimes just in French...)
- Nexity
- Century21
- Foncia
- La Forêt
By early March, I found a pretty ideal place through Century 21. It was close to tram and bus lines, right up the street from Auchan, just a few minutes from Centre Ville and the quai. I was eager to get the paperwork signed because I was hoping to have the place set up by the time Jason arrived.
NOPE.
There's no credit check in France so you have to prove you have the money to pay your rent. Here is what a typical housing application file will include in France:
- Copies of your ID (passport)
- Bank account information (RIB)
- Work contract and/or bank statements proving that you can pay the rent
- It is the law in France that you cannot rent an apartment that is more than one-third your net monthly income.
- Last three pay stubs
- Last two income tax statements
- Proof of current address in France (gas/electric/water/landline phone bill)
- Your cell phone bill is not sufficient
- Copy of previous lease agreement
Once you have gathered a small forest's worth of papers, you may also be asked to find a garant (sometimes also called a caution). It's explained very well here (in French) but the long story short is that they are a co-signer so that in the event that you don't pay your rent, the agency will come after your garant for the money. This was completely insane to me, but apparently it is normal in France. The law here is very much in favor of the renter. Landlords cannot evict you in the winter and it can take up to two years to kick you out, regardless of the season, even if you don't pay your rent during that whole period. When I learned this, it made sense why some of these apartments were available for so long. Better to take a month to find the right person than to rent to the first bum off the street who might not pay anything at all after the deposit and first month.
Sometimes all a garant has to do is sign the lease along with you, as was the case with Ashley and Guillaume. His mom rolled up and with a flick of a pen, they had a new place to live. Not so in our case, even though we were also going through Century 21. (WTF??) The agent needed the garant to provide all of the documents that we had provided. I was floored. I have been here for four months and the only people I know are my Chinese classmates and my teachers. There's no way I could ask any of them for all that stuff. Jason arrived the day after I got this news and we asked around at his job to see if anyone was willing or able to do it. Some people said it was normal for agencies to require it and they had their parents do it for them, others said it was completely outrageous. Either way, no one was volunteering. Even though we had proved we had the money for it (and then some), we still needed someone to sign with us.
Back to the drawing board.
Pro Tip 3: When you find a place you like, ask up front if they will require a garant. You may need to explain your situation and provide some documents about it, but it's better than getting your hopes up, only to be told you will be systematically denied for lack of a garant. If you absolutely need one and don't know anyone in France, you may be able to get one through a company. Check out Loca-pass and this website, which is a registry of companies that may offer you garant services if you don't know any French people. Be aware, though: We didn't qualify for these because we're too old and because Jason has a real job. Oh well.
What ultimately led me to finding our new apartment was the French version of Craigslist: Le Bon Coin. You can search for pretty much anything on there, including apartments. Armed with the knowledge from my failed initial attempts and a bit of urgency since sharing a twin bed is the worst thing ever, I was on the hunt again. I now knew the right questions to ask (When is the apartment available? Do you require a garant? How much is due up front?) and didn't waste time going on visits to places that weren't going to work out anyway.
Pro Tip 4: If you're anything like me, you will be tempted by big-name agencies because you will think them to be more credible. This may not be the case. Some agencies are bums and will not take care of problems in your apartment if you have them. Your colleagues may offer a friend of a friend who knows a guy who has a place to rent. Against your American judgement, this might be your best bet. They probably won't charge you an agency fee and they might treat you better because you're a friend (of a friend of a friend). YOU JUST NEVER KNOW. Ask around as much as possible to get a feel for the rental climate in your area.
Once I figured it out, it really wasn't too difficult. I saw the ad two weeks ago on a Monday and replied to it, I set up a visit for later that week, I brought my application file with me and gave it to her that day. Two days later, she called me and told me our application had been accepted. I had to go by the agency and pay the deposit last week. Today, we had our état des lieux meeting, in which you go through everything in the house and write down it's condition, and then she handed us the keys. The furniture is being dropped off on Friday and we'll be sleeping in a real bed by this weekend! We thought of furnishing the place via Le Bon Coin as well but since we don't have a car and the new apartment is on the top floor of the building, we just decided to buy everything from Ikea and have it delivered. Problem solved.
Why someone couldn't have just told me all that when I got here, I don't know, but I figured it out and I am glad it's over. I hope that this post can help other poor souls looking for a place to live in France. This website is also incredibly useful. That link is the housing page but they have all kinds of other information for anglophones, too. It is a long and arduous process but it's a pretty good feeling to be living in a place that I actually enjoy coming home to. Worth it.
Can't wait to throw a housewarming party!!
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Back in the Swing of Things
After such a wonderful break, the jury was still out on my feelings about coming back to Bordeaux. Obviously, I am having a grand old time here but it was so good, maybe too good, being home. I'm glad I planned my trip so tightly that I didn't really have time to think about it. I got back to my apartment on Sunday afternoon and on Monday morning, I was back in action. There's no time to be homesick when you have work to do!
And I have certainly been keeping busy as of late. Starting last Monday, I picked up another "student." Ema is three and a half and this is her first venture into English. Her parents speak some (not nearly as well as Alexis' parents) and they are all about this Baby-langues thing. They have read all the books and been to all the meetings and they are really exited about Ema learning to speak English from a real American. I'm not really a baby-sitter in their eyes; they're even in the house most times that I work with Ema. They are in this so that their kid learns English from a native speaker, and I am happy to be of service.
It's nice that I have Ema two days a week, instead of just one like Alexis. It's also easier to make progress with her because she wasn't traumatized by English like Alexis was with his last sitter. I know it's the Baby-langues method to speak only English and have the children repeat after you all the time but when you're working with a kid under the age of five who is just getting comfortable with their command of French, it's hard to just stroll into their lives and flip the script on them. It's frustrating for me sometimes to operate in another language and I'm an adult who willingly volunteered for this! Overall, I think things are going well with both kids and I am enjoying myself for the time being. It helps that both sets of parents are so cool. They are really nice to me and make the effort to explain to their children what a great opportunity it is to have a native English speaker come and hang out with them every week. Plus, I'm getting paid to color and sing songs and hang out with little kids for a couple hours a week. Can't beat that!
I am also "working" as an English tutor for the director of my campus, Philippe. Mireille put me in touch with him when he asked if she knew anyone who could help him get back into his study of English. In exchange for my tutoring services, he's going to sign off on an extension of my visa until October. That buys me quite a bit of time to get my next move figured out. I don't know if that means I'll be taking more classes or what but it I'm not even worried about it. I don't have to leave the country in May! Yay! Right now, we're doing one hour-and-a-half session a week but I think we're going to try to shoot for three hours a week. He has some pretty ambitious goals for himself so we're definitely gonna need more time. Fine by me: I'm trying to get a job as an English teacher in one of the schools around here so I need the experience and he'll be a great reference.
This morning, I got to miss class to go to the immigration office (OFII). A bunch of the Chinese kids from school were there, too, but they all had afternoon class that they had to go to afterward. Suckers! I don't know why I was concerned about this visit; I had heard nothing but nice things about it from students who had already been through the process. Official government procedures always made me anxious, though. Being deported would be the worst! Fortunately, it was no big deal at all. As per the usual, everyone was really friendly, they all spoke English when I needed it, and it was quite easy. I would have worn a different outfit had I known I was going to have to strip from the waist up for my chest x-ray but other than that, it was pretty seamless. Get an x-ray, answer some general health questions with the nurse, have your x-ray examined by the doctor, more health questions, and then boom. They put a little sticker in your passport and you're good to go. Can't kick me out now! I'm official!
The only thing I am not enjoying right now is this weather. It hadn't been too bad since I got back but today is just ridiculous. It started raining in the middle of the night and it hasn't stopped since. I suppose we're down to a light mist now but this morning, on my way to OFII, it was pouring AND windy. My umbrella even flipped inside out and evoked pity and concern from all the French ladies in the street at the time. "Oh là là, la pauvre." Yeah, thanks. Lot of help your comments are doing with my jacked up umbrella in the middle of a downpour. Oh yeah, and the high today was a whopping 39 degrees. Misery!!!! Needless to say, I am very much looking forward to springtime.
I'm till trying to find a better apartment and still looking for a more serious job. I have leads on both of these things but progress is slow and time is moving fast. Ugh! But I am confident I will work it out and that's pretty exciting in and of itself. I am also still planning to try out for that rugby team on Friday (last Friday, I spent the whole day in the house catching up on my sleep!) so hopefully that will get me closer to my goal of having more French friends. It's all coming together...
Don't worry about me. I got this living in France thing under control.
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